Illegals dressed as Marines

The Quip Pig says "I just said one of you, use the Perez name tag, not all of you!"

Illegal Immigrants Apprehended Wearing Marine Uniforms

Belly Flop High Dive Champion

The Quip Pig says, "What kind of splash will Professor Splash make when he maxes out?"

Professor Splash Sets World Record 

Space Monkeys Are Expensive

The Quip Pig says "Iranians must not be able to afford live monkeys for their space missions."

Iranians send Monkey Doll into Space

Are slaves paid $10,720,000?

The Quip Pig says, "If this is slavery, count me in."

Football players are slaves? 

$19,000 for Preschool?

The Quip Pig says, "Paying $19,000 for her child's preschool? And now she's suing the school for ruining her daughter's chance to get into an Ivy league school?

Someone should sue the mom!"

Mom sues preschool for cheating daughter out of Ivy League

Startled Man Finds Bullet

The Quip Pig says, "It's amazing it didn't explode. Such bravery should be rewarded."

.22 Bullet found in Street

Intruder Calls 911 on Homeowner?

The Quip Pig says (in best Clint Eastwood voice), "You've got to ask yourself one question: 

'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya punk?”

Intruder calls 911, afraid homeowner may have a gun 

Going Up?

The Quip Pig says "Saudis Mobilize Thousands of Troops to Quell Growing Revolt...I think the price of gas is going to go up some more."

Jesse's Cafe' Americain - More Revolution

What's in your hands?

The Quip Pig Says "Going grocery shopping this weekend? Interested in a pair of gloves?"

Fecal Matter Found on 72% of Grocery Carts

Comments are the Best

The Quip Pig says "Gotta love the comments section of the newspaper. Consider these comments written about an article about a A California womans who survives a ride on the hood of her minivan.

"Minivan's can go 100 MPH?" - Stroh

"He should also be ticketed for having a unsecured load." - user0one

"I'm guessing she won't do that again." - Sgt Hartman

The Quip Pig Mourns In Private

The Quip Pig Mourns the loss of a relative...Alas poor Bacon. 

They mourn the monetary cost. 

While it cost you everything.

What it Cost Bacon

Epic Ski Fail

The Quip Pig says, "Have you ever seen those really awesome extreme downhill skiers, doing their thing down really steep and dangerous look mountains? Well they screw up also. Watch.